{"id":2514,"date":"2018-05-11T00:09:37","date_gmt":"2018-05-11T00:09:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/?p=2514"},"modified":"2018-05-13T04:49:00","modified_gmt":"2018-05-13T04:49:00","slug":"sorin-olariu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/sorin-olariu\/","title":{"rendered":"Sorin Olariu"},"content":{"rendered":"

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GASTRONOMIE GEOPOLITIC\u0102<\/strong><\/p>\n

Rom\u00e2nii no\u0219tri, plini de zel,
\nSe-ntorc cu fa\u021ba spre Apus:
\nMai bine Varz\u0103 de Bruxelles
\nDec\u00e2t Salat\u0103 a la Russe.<\/p>\n

DIVOR\u021a AMIABIL<\/strong><\/p>\n

S\u0103 divor\u021b\u0103m civilizat
\nC\u0103 doar niciunul nu-i mai breaz:
\nTu nu m\u0103 suferi c\u00e2nd sunt beat,
\nEu nu te suf\u0103r c\u00e2nd sunt treaz.<\/p>\n

EPIFABUL\u0102 MIORITIC\u0102<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u021aara noastr\u0103 de-o cutreieri
\nNu-i nici mare, nu-i nici mic\u0103,
\n\u00cens\u0103 are-at\u00e2\u021bia greieri
\nC\u0103 de-a dreptul te furnic\u0103.<\/p>\n

PARADOX ROM\u00c2NESC<\/strong><\/p>\n

C\u00e2nd rom\u00e2nii sunt pe-afar\u0103
\nSe topesc din dor de \u021bar\u0103,
\nIar \u00een \u021bar\u0103 se ususc\u0103:
\nSe topesc din dor de duc\u0103.<\/p>\n

MUN\u021aII NO\u0218TRI<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mun\u021bii no\u0219tri aur poart\u0103,
\n\u00cens\u0103 fir-ar ea de soart\u0103,
\nC\u0103 \u00eel poart\u0103, cum se pare,
\nTot la al\u021bii-n buzunare!<\/p>\n

PROMISIUNI RESPECTATE<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ale\u0219ii-au spus odinioar\u0103
\nC\u0103 ajuta\u021bi de UE, NATO,
\nEi vor dura o nou\u0103 \u021bar\u0103.
\n\u0218i uite c\u0103 au terminat-o!<\/p>\n

FEMEILE<\/strong><\/p>\n

Fiin\u021be ce ne-au fost l\u0103sate
\nCa leacuri la singur\u0103tate.
\nNecazu-i c\u0103 sunt leacuri care
\nProduc efecte secundare.<\/p>\n

POLI\u021aIA LA DATORIE<\/strong><\/p>\n

Azi, t\u00e2lharii to\u021bi sunt varz\u0103,
\nI-am \u00eenchis pe mii \u0219i mii,
\nBa am arestat \u0219i-o barz\u0103
\nPentru trafic de copii.<\/p>\n

MOTIV DE EMIGRARE<\/strong><\/p>\n

De-aceea emigrai
\n\u0218i nu o mai ascund:
\nPiciorul meu de plai
\nMi-a dat un \u0219ut \u00een fund.<\/p>\n

POLITICIENII ROM\u00c2NI<\/strong><\/p>\n

Cinsti\u021bi \u0219i drep\u021bi din cale-afar\u0103,
\nEi sunt un leac de nota 10:
\nDe c\u00e2te ori mi-e dor de \u021bar\u0103
\nM\u0103 uit la poza lor \u0219i-mi trece.<\/p>\n

CAT\u00c2RUL<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pe vremuri, la o ferm\u0103 bogat\u0103 \u015fi frumoas\u0103,
\nTr\u0103ia printre-animale \u015fi un cat\u00e2r de ras\u0103.
\n\u015ei se muncea acolo \u00eentr-un continuu flux,
\nDoar el, cat\u00e2rul nostru era \u015fomer de lux.<\/p>\n

De-aceea chiar st\u0103p\u00e2nul, nemaiav\u00e2nd r\u0103bdare,
\n\u00cel trase deoparte \u015fi \u0163i-l lu\u0103 cam tare:
\n– A\u015fa nu se mai poate, m-a apucat oftica,
\nTu doar m\u0103n\u00e2nci f\u00e2ne\u0163ea \u015fi nu produci nimica!<\/p>\n

Ia uite la M\u0103r\u0163uic\u0103, b\u0103tr\u00e2nul nostru bou
\nCum trage toata ziua, \u00een plug, ca un erou.
\nSau uite la Joiana cea care zi \u015fi noapte
\nNe d\u0103 la toat\u0103 lumea g\u0103le\u0163i \u00eentregi cu lapte.<\/p>\n

G\u0103inile de-asemeni se screm \u015fi una dou\u0103
\nNe pricopsesc deodat\u0103 cu zeci \u015fi zeci de ou\u0103.
\nChiar \u015fi coco\u015ful nostru acela pintenat
\nNe c\u00e2nt\u0103 diminea\u0163a s\u0103 ne scul\u0103m din pat.<\/p>\n

Ori harnicul de Murgu, prea bl\u00e2ndul nostru cal
\nCe trage la c\u0103ru\u0163\u0103, la vale \u015fi la deal.
\nDe-aceea-\u0163i spun cu riscul de a p\u0103rea cam snob
\nC\u0103-i musai azi \u00een ferm\u0103 s\u0103-\u0163i iei \u015fi tu un job.<\/p>\n

Ai dou\u0103 variante, de mult au fost g\u00e2ndite,
\n\u00cen dou\u0103 posturi cheie, pu\u0163in cam diferite.
\nS\u0103 tragi \u015fareta nou\u0103 ce-o vezi l\u00e2ng\u0103 hambar
\nSau peste animale s\u0103 fii parlamentar.<\/p>\n

– St\u0103p\u00e2ne, rog m\u0103 iart\u0103, \u0163i-o spun doar amical:
\nSunt doar cat\u00e2r, n-am trupul puternic ca un cal
\n\u0218i nici nu m\u0103 calific s\u0103 fiu parlamentar\u2026
\nDoar vezi destul de bine c\u0103 nu sunt chiar m\u0103gar!<\/p>\n

T\u0102URA\u0218UL<\/strong><\/p>\n

La ferma lui Matache din margine de sat
\nTr\u0103ia un taur m\u00e2ndru, la fel de lung c\u00e2t lat.
\nL-au poreclit Spartacus, c\u0103 prea era rebel
\n\u0218i nimenea din ferm\u0103 nu se punea cu el.<\/p>\n

\u00cel admirau v\u0103cute \u0219i \u00eel priveau cu jale,
\nEl le d\u0103dea cu tifla, zic\u00e2nd c\u0103 sunt nasoale.
\n– N-am timp de m\u0103run\u021bi\u0219uri, sunt tare ocupat,
\nSt\u0103p\u00e2nul nostru m\u00e2ine m\u0103 duce la castrat.<\/p>\n

– Tu \u0219tii ce vrea s\u0103-nsemne? \u00cel scoase din \u021b\u00e2\u021b\u00e2n\u0103
\nCu \u00eentrebarea asta o vac\u0103 mai b\u0103tr\u00e2n\u0103.
\n– Normal c\u0103 \u0219tiu, b\u0103bu\u021bo, doar nu m\u0103-nve\u021bi pe mine:
\nE-un loc cu pajisti grase \u0219i multe vaci virgine.<\/p>\n

\u0218i-acolo toat\u0103 ziua, ascult\u0103 bine ce-i:,
\nAm s\u0103 le fac la toate-o mul\u021bime de vi\u021bei!
\n– Desigur c-ai dreptate, succesu-i garantat!
\nDar afl\u0103, spuse d\u00e2nsa, c\u0103 prea te duci montat.<\/p>\n

\u2026<\/p>\n

Morala-i spus\u0103 bine de vaca cea b\u0103tr\u00e2n\u0103
\nPrivindu-l pe Spartacus cam dup-o s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2n\u0103,
\nO s\u0103pt\u0103m\u00e2na-n care, lucrat mai pe la spate,
\n\u00cen via\u021ba lui Spartacus destule-au fost schimbate:<\/p>\n

– Ia uit\u0103-te la \u0103sta: i-au pus \u00een nas belciug,
\nSe uit\u0103-n gol, s\u0103rmanul, \u0219i trage greu \u00een plug.
\nIar dac-auzi vreodat\u0103 c\u00e2te-un cuv\u00e2nt mai nou
\n\u00centreab\u0103-nt\u00e2i ce \u00eenseamn\u0103 \u0219i n-ai sa pici de bou!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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GASTRONOMIE GEOPOLITIC\u0102<\/s...\n<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[30],"tags":[],"coauthors":[75],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4rsGx-Ey","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2514"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2514"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2514\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2516,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2514\/revisions\/2516"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2514"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2514"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2514"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nymagazin.com\/en_US\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/coauthors?post=2514"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}